a blog of random thoughts flying through my head with the ease of a pelican and the poignancy of a well dressed, well spoken, opinionated girl from the south.
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
the sound of silence
As I watched a popular children's program alongside the toddler yesterday...the little pigs roaming the so perfectly animated library that I could almost smell the books, the institutionalism of it all...I started thinking...while I was in college the library was, on most occasions, the furthest thing from my mind. I preferred studying in my room or at my house rather than packing up and isolating myself in a place where everyone was as quiet as bedtime but the lights a bright contradiction to the overwhelming sudden sleepiness that would overcome me when stepping foot into those giant papered halls. But now, when I think about the library I feel different. My first thought as those little pigs were circling up for story time was that I would love to be holed up somewhere in my college behemoth of a library...studying, reading, letting the silence wash over me and absorbing every bit of it. Maybe it's because I'm constantly surrounded by noise...from the toddler running wild to the dogs incessant barking to protect their territory from the neighborhood cat, to the constant drone of the television. I admit, the television is on most days...albeit on children's educational programming, but still...it's on. Another spoke in this wheel of thought is how odd is is that bookstores have become pseudo-libraries...everyone whispering...even in the mall (really, these books are for purchase people!) And then there's Starbucks...a virtual med-school...everyone with their books splayed open...headphones on...highlighters highlighting...faces of consternation. My only thought...wow, you people are so smart and also you're taking up two tables for all your...er, learning. Maybe it's the structure or the rigidness of the library I crave, or maybe it's the deadline I crave...a far cry from when I was actually in school...cramming as if my life depended on it. And, well...it did. And now, it seems I could lose myself in those quiet, sterile study rooms. Maybe it's the feeling of accomplishment, feeling like you're getting something done...learning something...making a difference in your own life...furthering your desire to be better at whatever it is you do. Somehow holing up at home doing laundry all day doesn't give that same rewarding feeling. And so, as I realize that I haven't stepped out of the house in two days because I've been...well, doing laundry and general chasing of the toddler and a little television in between, I am completely lost in thought...in another place enjoying the silence...and maybe learning a thing or two as well.